Silent Tears

I have decided to write about something that chills most people to the bone. Childhood sexual abuse.

I have to pause here and really think about how to approach what I feel needs to be said. I ponder the hesitation and conclude that this is a very heavy topic. Perhaps a topic to heavy to talk about in the open. But this even I feel I must say something. Just something.......

Over these two weeks I have spoken to 2 women who are brave enough to share their stories with me. Brave, brave women who have survived and more than that who live and grow and flourish as women despite the horrid experiences they endured at the wicked hands of another.

As I was cooking supper this evening an anger began to rise within me and so I decided to write about the silent tears that are shed by those who walk among us; those we know and love ; those we work with; hundreds upon hundreds of women and men who as little girls were violated in a sexual way. As I stirred the tomato I absentmindedly began to count how many women had shared their story with me. In a flash I counted 5. With more careful consideration I can count up to 20 such women. A brother, uncle, father, teacher, cousin, friend's father, domestic help , neighbour, grandfather, boyfriend of a sibling, etc. etc......

Childhood sexual abuse is wicked. It lurks about like an invisible mist traveling here and there and destroying and breaking as it goes. As I listen to these women and their individual stories I am struck by a few things. Firstly they are broken and have been very deeply wounded by their experience. Secondly each woman had searched out professional help which probably enabled them to speak openly about their pain and experience and lastly each knew the person who had abused them personally.

This evening I would like to salute these women. Women of great courage and strength. Women who traveled towards their deep pain and hurt and longed for healing and searched for it. Women who have risked trusting another human being when all they knew about trust was destroyed.

I also want to salute the loving men who have come along side these women and cared and loved enough. These men have been part of the healing and help that these women needed. Each has described a husband who has been part of the real and rightly intended intimacy and been part of the healing.

I know that many of them have faced great struggles and hurdles to healing but have preserved. Perhaps these wounds and hurts will be a life long challenge. For many women Jesus has been their constant love and hope and healer. How great he is.....

As I hear and struggle with the absurd wickedness of man in these cases, I am so aware of today. Yes we are so much more aware of Childhood sexual abuse and we talk and prepare our kids with tools to stand up "should they fall victim" to such wickedness but the truth is that evil is alive and well in man ............... So I want to encourage parents to continue with talk and tools and always be aware. Never let down your guard in this regard and if you know Jesus then cry out to him for wisdom and help and safety.

I end with a heavy heart aching for the deep wounding of the silent ones. May God have mercy on us.